Dear Friends and Readers,
Now that its finally okay for me to say it – I’ve changed jobs !
The reasons behind leaving my previous workplace were varied, conflicting, and ultimately the most difficult decision I have had to make in my whole life.
I’ve seen some of my peers and friends leave their first jobs with nary a care, looking ahead to the promise of the future.
But I’ve always been sentimental like that – and old fashioned like that – the first thing I thought of was – “What am I leaving behind” and not “What lies beyond my present?” – A question I constantly asked myself was, why are you leaving your dream job ? The job that you have always known you wanted, where you have had the privilege of living and breathing Singapore’s heartbeat, where you have made amazing friends for life.
And I think the most straightforward answer I can put out here is that my priorities changed when K and I got married. I realized that my job was no longer just about me. To be honest, if I had still been single, I would not have left – I would have been content slogging 24/7 , pushing myself beyond the point of exhaustion but ultimately feeling that I had the most fulfilling job in the world.
But things changed when I became a wife – there are people waiting for me in my house, Little B and K, waiting for me to come back and make it a home. K, who has held my hand through 2 of the hardest years of my life without complaint, deserves better than a wife who is available only sporadically on weekends and absent most weeknights.
He deserves a good hot dinner, clean clothes, and a smile from me after coming home from a grueling day at work. Unfortunately, for the past two years, he got a stressed-out, angsty, and unhappy girlfriend/wife who was a ticking time bomb that may or may not explode at the mention of ‘dirty laundry’.
Then there is my family, who I so desperately want to see more of before they pack up and move to Hong Kong, possibly leaving me more alone than I have ever been. You only have one chance to be a good daughter, a good sister, and a good grand-daughter and Life is too short to not be around when they need you the most.
And my friends, who have had dinner dates cancelled on them so many times some have texted me to ask them if I was angry (?!) with them and avoiding them on purpose.
So it is with mixed feelings that I closed the last chapter of my life, as a crime reporter at Singapore Press Holdings.
I, excuse my french, kept my sh*t together for the whole of my last day but that night as I packed to leave to visit my Dad in HKG, I sobbed loudly into my suitcase. I honestly felt like I had physically ripped away part of my identity in leaving my job.
Come Monday, I’ll be starting out at Yahoo! as an entertainment journalist – something completely new and different from my previous job but hopefully, will be yet another blast to add to my growing list of life experiences !
I had originally intended to skim over this issue in my blog because I’m worried that its too personal and there are too many people reading this space but what’s the point – personal blogs aren’t meant for self-censorship and this is a milestone I want to look back and remember for the rest of my life!
Here’s to moving on and up !